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  • 6 Types of People You Will See at a College Starbucks

    For many college students Starbucks is a home away from home but no matter how long you sit in there or what time you come in, these people will always be there.

    The Way-Too-Happy-At-7AM Barista
    So what that she had to be at work at 5 A.M., has massive debt, and her boyfriend just left her? She is ready to take your order and happy to do it.
    Despite the fact that she makes minimum wage and gets vacation time in the form of minutes (seriously, look up the Starbucks vacation policy), this seemingly lobotomized individual probably came from a broken home where her father was a violent drunk and her mother was Liza Minelli. Cut her some slack.

    The Guy With The Massive Order
    There is nothing worse than standing in line behind the guy who will walk out of the store with two trays of coffee. This jackass pulled the short straw and now has to get coffee for everyone at his job and will undoubtedly be reading from a list. That list will be poorly legible. You will continue to wait because you need your fix and will ultimately be greeted by the peppy barista whose happiness will ruin your day completely.

    The Writer
    The Writer is a mainstay at every Starbucks location because as a rule we are addicted to coffee.  You can easily spot the writer as the guy with the MacBook and the look of desperation on his face.

    Guy Who Makes You Order Using Starbucks Sizes
    At some point in their history, Starbucks decided that normal sizes will make people wonder why they have paid so much for the shot-glass-sized cup of coffee so they created an intricate system in which every size on the menu is a synonym of large.
    Ever since then, there has been that one employee per Starbucks behind the counter who refuses to accept orders for a “Small” or “Medium” coffee because “It isn’t on the menu.”
    Even worse is the employee who will correct you and say “You mean you want a ‘Venti’.”  Well if I wanted a Venti then I would have ordered a Venti instead of what I really want which is essentially a bucket of caffeine.

    Fancy Order Guy
    While being stuck behind the guy ordering for the whole office is the worst, fancy order guy is a close second. No one really “wants” a Mocha Chai Latte with Soy Milk, an extra shot, and whipped cream, they just want a friend.

    The Sleeping Bum
    Another mainstay of the Starbucks crowd is the sleeping homeless person who typically smells like a weird mix of tuna salad and puke. Odds are, he used to own the coffee shop across the street till Starbucks moved in.